Raya 2008

There will be 2 more days to raya.As usual I will be celebrating it in pj.Similar to the past years,I don't feel excited to celebrate it.I think it's not because I'm getting older,it's just me.Nowadays it's hard to get me excited on things.I do hope that everyone else will be celebrating this happily with your loved ones.So Selamat Hari Raya and maaf zahir batin to all.End.

Just breathe

Did you ever notice that when you drive along a familiar route let's say to your office everyday where you have to go through 10 traffic lights,what matters and determine how the journey will be like is the very first traffic light.What I meant was that if you are lucky and you reach the first traffic light when it is green,you can estimate that you can reach your destination earlier cause chances are the other 9 will be greens as well.Same goes if you hit the first traffic light red,you know that you will reach your destination maybe 20 minutes later than usual cause usually it's gonna be reds all the way.
In some parts of the route,you can see from far the traffic light still being green but as you reach nearer to your dismay it turned to yellow then red and you will have to stop.
You have this slight regret even if you don't want to thinking if only you came out earlier or drove faster or just do something better things could be different in a good way. You know that those that hit green at the first traffic light still face the possibilities of having obstacles in the middle somewhere but you just know that they won't have it as much as you had.You knew cause you've been there.Once you were those having the smooth sailing journey.You kinda missed it and can't help but envy the lucky ones now.You sulk when you see one red lights after another cause it made your journey slower but because of that you finally noticed the surroundings around you.The one that you just pass by everyday and not bothering to look at.It brought out a smile in the end.
There's also the case when towards the end of those traffic lights you can see from far that it is still green and you knew that if you push it a little bit you might make it but you are scared that after all those trouble it might turn red and you were then left disappointed again.You have no idea if it is worth all the trouble.The decision is in your hand.
I guess that's how life is.Right now I am one of those hitting reds all the way.I admit it's kind of draining my energy and emotions and I can't help but wonder how life is in the fast lane.I am no where near the destination nor do I know where it will end but after noticing everything that made up my journey I guess life ain't cruel after all.Sorry if you can't understand all these ramblings.End.

wanya's nikki

I found my old diary today.I tried to read back what I wrote in there but I can't bring myself to read everything cause I was so lame that I would either died of embarrassment or of laughing too much.No kidding.Some of the examples of how lame I was:

1. I wrote the office addresses of kru and some of my favorite artistes under the important addresses section.I don't know why I did that cause I never attempted to write to them or visited them.
2. I wrote the name of my favorite singers and their birth dates (complete with pictures) in case I forget.Actually I lied in some of it.I don't really like half of the artistes I wrote but cause they were the "it" people at that time,I pretended to like them too wtf tipu diary sendiri.
3. The way I wrote.Boy oh boy, the sentences are like it jumped from some teen magazines or something.And here I am wondering why my younger cousins read all those teen mags that have articles that can make me puke anytime cause of how lame they wrote.I wrote in bm btw so since I was never good in bm I made up some of the words.I am an embarrassment to the society.
4. I wrote about the guys that I met back then when I was in school.Since I was quite scared that my mom would found the diary and read it (cause my mom don't like the idea of me being friends with boys),I replaced their names with girls names.Because of what I did, when I read back I have no idea who the hell these people are cause I can't remember who these names represented for.
5. I wrote about the criteria of my future husband.Sigh what la do I know in form 2 right.I wrote that I want someone like my dad.So sweet right.Then I read on that I want someone that can cook and clean the house everyday :)).I never know I am that lazy back then until the criteria for my ideal husband is like that.It's like I am searching for a maid instead of a husband.
6. I was so lame that the last entry in that diary which was in 2003 is about how I'm in disbelief of how lame I wrote when I was in school.
7. 5 years later I'm doing the same thing all over again.

To be fair,I first started to write in that diary when I was in form 1.I hope everyone else was lame too when they were younger.It's quite sad reading them and realizing how I lost touch with lots of people.I can't even remember half of the people that I wrote in the name and address column.I knew I was friends back then with these people but I just can't remember who they are or how the look like.I even anticipated that I would forget ok cause in form 2 I wrote about my best friends and I even pasted their pictures cause I wrote that I was scared when I grew much older,I will forget them.Thank god I didn't but 10 years down the road I can't say that I was as close to them as I was in school.That's really sad.
It is a good thing though that I found that diary cause last night I can't sleep thinking of some of my regrets in life.The what ifs and all.Reading back I come to terms why I am in this position and why I did what I did.Thinking back, all that weren't regrets after all.Those were just some decisions I made and I learn to live with it.I admit some weren't the best decisions that I can make but it did help me to grow up.It just took some trips back to memory lane and a lame writings of a naive school kid for me to understand all that.

Now please excuse me,I will now proceed to burn the diary.End.

Welcome note

Hello.Welcome to wanya84.blogspot.com.This is my first entry here.I tried to make this blog as close as it can be to my old blog but since I'm quite lazy to search for blogskin so this layout is the nearest layout to the one in xanga that I can find.It will be better if blogspot have comic sans but it's ok I'll live with it.I had also painstakingly copied almost all my entries excluding 3 entries from xanga to here (yes,all 243 of them + some entries for private viewing) in case my xanga account will be closed.If you have noticed I had also put labels on them cause I love blogs with labels.While I was transferring the entries I glanced through some of them.It sure brought so many memories from 4 years ago.What I didn't like though was that I didn't wrote clearly in some of the entries on what was actually happening at the time I was writing those cause some of them were quite personal so since my memory is failing me,I can't even understand what I wrote.Seriously my memory is so bad that when I read back those entries it felt like reading a storybook or someone else's diary cause I can't remember doing some stuffs or feeling certain ways before.So here's to many more memories.End.

liu xing yu

I'm so hating xanga right now.It takes forever to load the page.Dahla suddenly the chatbox deleted itself again.Might consider changing it to other space or stop blogging altogether.
Recently I watched meteor garden once again after 6 years of not watching it.I just remembered vaguely the storyline cause I only watched it once and I rushed in finishing the episodes last time so it actually felt like watching a new series.There are a lot of reasons why I love the series.Part of it was it somehow reminded me of the good old days in melaka cause I remembered it was during that time I bought and watched the series in mmu.I think meteor garden is the perfect example of what I love from a drama series.I don't really like the storyline of some of korean drama series where everyone will be suffering and crying in 40 episodes and we were then rewarded with happy moments for about 5 minutes in the last episode wtf.I don't want a series with not much drama in it too cause then it will be boring.I just want a series filled with drama but there are still happiness and sweet moments in between (memberi perasaan manis according to subtitle in meteor garden).And boy how can we not love the heroes of the korean and taiwanese series.I don't know how they do it but I think it's so much easier to felt in love with the characters in these series than the american or malaysian series.These actors were so passionate in the sense of the way they look and talk that they actually made us felt that they were really in love with the leading actress in the series.Even if I don't like the actors in real life too I can still felt in love with their characters in the series.In conclusion I just really love meteor garden 1 especially the storyline.This will sound very very lame but it somehow reminded me of how it felt like during the phase of having a crush on people.Le sigh.Actually I planned to write longer but I think it will ended up sounding fangirlish so I shall stop now.

Oh below is one of my favourite scenes.This was the part where dao ming shi was so excited that san chai gave him cookies she made herself for his birthday.These will only happen on good looking people.I think if I gave people cookies hangus I made myself for birthday,people must be throwing back the cookies at me.

p/s:You know there's alwas something wrong with a country when the perpetrator get a very minor punishment,protected by law and don't even bother showing any remorse and still get lots of supports while the person who reported the crime was rewarded with ISA.Go figure.End.